Nobody says it out loud, but everyone is wondering the same thing. The amount of guilt we are ready to take on as parents, especially mothers, is overwhelming.
From what we ate, to where we lived, the type of birth, our mental health during pregnancy, during conception, etc. It’s incredible, it’s understandable, it’s unbelievable and utterly unfair TO YOU.
I can think of no better way to give your power away if not by having this thought process. I see so many moms who are mindlessly focused on this fear and guilt. Even if you are not saying it out loud, you’re thinking it. It’s evident in the way you reject yourself, placing yourself not even last in your priority list, being angry at yourself, at others, questioning, skeptical, anxious, you want to do everything under the sun in terms of therapies or interventions, then days go by and you want to do absolutely nothing. You make a huge list of things to do, then you procrastinate or don’t complete. It’s a roller coaster ride!
You’re not alone. Been there, did that. Still guilty of it at times.
Here is what I have to tell you.
You didn’t cause your child’s autism. Especially YOU, the worn out, guilt stricken, numbed out mom reading this post.
There is no single documented reason why our children get diagnosed. There are multiple factors that impact a child’s health and development. From genetics, to epigenetics, how loaded our systems are with toxins given the environment we live in, the connection of mold to neuroinflammation, the gut disbalance, the parental stress, the childhood trauma, the dependency on technology, the addiction to screens or junk food, the fact our land, water and produce is carrying substances that belong in a lab - the list goes on.
What I am trying to say is, the guilt you carry is for all of us to carry as a world and a nation. You have not failed your child or hurt them or caused this to happen.
You may not be able to control how or why you got here. But the future is yours. What you do with it is in your hands.
Reality is - nothing is impossible when it comes to our children. They are gifted, we see the evidence every day. They have the ability to go further than where you see them be today. And you can get them there, I assure you! But the ability to see the best in them comes from not seeing the worst in you.
So when you come ask me, what should be your first step in helping your child with autism. You will hear me say - start from YOU.
Contributed by:
Batool Mirza
Facebook Group: Autism Parents Empowerment Group, Canada
